Sweet sally port, it has been a busy couple of weeks since I last posted. Well, it feels like it's been busy. Either way, I currently feel like a zombie. I should be sleeping right now, but apparently zombie me wanted to be somewhat productive and write a post of god knows what. Then again, non-zombie me doesn't plan this shit out either so it's not all that different. Did you guys think I plan this stuff? Yeesh. I ain't that organised.
I guess the biggest update that I have for you guys is that I made the decision to drop the MCAT. In a way it was an easy decision, but it was also very hard for me to click that "cancel" button. Bottom line is that I wasn't ready nor would I have been ready for testing day. I haven't studied Chemistry or Physics since high school and I haven't even touched Organic Chemistry. I was slightly naive to think I could shove three text books worth of new and newish material into my head in under two months while working a full-time job. Yeah, it wasn't happening. Believe me, I tried. I did study, but it felt like everything I was studying wasn't sticking and I always had to go back and review what I had studied the day before in order to continue studying the new stuff. I hate giving up. Years of playing hockey has made me a very competitive person, even when it comes to my academics and I loathe the thought of being a failure. I love giving myself a good challenge. However, I confess that I bit off more than I could chew with this one. Pulling the plug on taking the MCAT was difficult even though I personally know that it is what is best for me. But that little voice in the back of head keeps trying to pipe up and tell me that everyone thinks I'm a quitter, that I gave up without a fight. God dammit, I'm paranoid that people are judging me for making a decision that could potentially label me as a failure. Now I feel like I'm defending myself against my competitive self and zombie self is just making a mess of trying to explain what regular self would like to say even though now there is a touch of sleep-deprived self that just want to be noticed and is trying to lighten the mood that paranoid self has set. Fuck off paranoid self. Nobody is judging us. Except for those fuckers who have the judging eyes... Fuck off, judgers or zombie self will rip out your judging eyes to get at your brains even though I promised that I wouldn't eat your brains. That promise excludes Judgy McJudgersons.
Anywho, rant is done. Bottom line is that I'm not ready for the MCAT this year and that I'm going to focus strictly on my chiropractic and physiotherapy applications and hope for the best. If I don't get in this year, than I now know how much time is needed in order to properly prepare myself to take the MCAT next year. There. Logic solved or some such damn thing.
Appropriately enough, it has started to storm outside. I don't like storms. They kind of scare me. Especially when it's all "THUNDERBOLTS AND LIGHTNING, VERY VERY FRIGHTENING ME GALILEO, galileo, GALILEOOOO" and all that jazz. Seriously, I slept over at a friend's house when I was younger and a thunderstorm rolled through during the night and I thought there was lightning in her room. Why? Because I forgot there was a big mirror in her room and saw the reflection of the lightning. Good job, little me. Good job, indeed. You were such a smart cookie. But seriously. I live in front of a forest with these big ass mamajama maple and oak trees. It those suckers get struck by lightning and (holy fuck my dog just farted and it smells absolutely rancid) the wind blows the right way (which is unfortunately what just happened because the dog is sitting in front of a fan that is blowing my way), chances are one of those bad boys is going to land on the roof over my room because I'm on the second floor of the house (câlice, I need to go find a gas mask or something because this odor could be mistaken for chemical warfare).
Anywho, methinks I'll wrap this up here. I need to go find stick my head out the window totry and get some sort of fresh air that isn't tainted by the smell of dog flatulence. That STANK is frakking RANK, yo. Maybe next time I'll tell y'all about the reenactment I went to this past weekend. The smell kind of reminds me of them good times.
Peace out, peeperjeeps!
Oooh, maples are rotten trees. So damn brittle when they get big. Wouldn't worry terribly much about oak though.
ReplyDeleteI already told you as much, but I think delaying the MCAT was a very reasonable thing to do. Plenty of time, plenty of opportunity; you're gonna do great at what you want when the time comes right.